CHIPPERONI

FADE IN:
 
              INT. PRIVATE OFFICE
 
              JAMES BALLANTINE, 40's, works at a large desk in an elegant
              office overlooking the downtown skyline.
 
                                  INTERCOM
                        Mr. Ballantine?
 
                                  BALLANTINE
                        Yes?
 
                                  INTERCOM
                        Your wife. Line one.
 
                                  BALLANTINE
                        Tell her I'll call her back.
 
                                  INTERCOM
                        She says it can't wait.
 
              Ballantine sighs and picks up the phone.
 
                                  BALLANTINE
                        Shelly, I haven't got time now, I-
 
              Ballantine drops his pen and listens intently.
 
                                  BALLANTINE
                               (continuing)
                        My God. Does anyone...Shelly, calm
                        down...Just...I know, I'm sorry, but
                        this is very important, sweetheart.
                        Does anyone else know?..Good...My
                        other gun is in the bedroom closet.
                        Just in case. I'll be there as soon
                        as I can. Just wait there and I'll
                        take care of this. Please! Our lives
                        are in your hands! I'll call you on
                        the way. Do not call me, understand?
                        I've got a disposable in the car.
 
              He hangs up the phone and unlocks his desk drawer, removing
              a .38 caliber revolver with an ornate pearl handle.
 
              He hits the intercom.
 
                                  BALLANTINE
                               (continuing)
                        Terry?
 
                                  INTERCOM
                        Yes, Mr. Ballantine?
 
                                  BALLANTINE
                        Why don't you take an early lunch?
 
                                  INTERCOM
                        Now, Mr. Ballantine?

                                  BALLANTINE
                        Now. I'm going to work through and
                        finish the Mardukas brief.
 
                                  INTERCOM
                        But you've nev-
 
                                  BALLANTINE
                        Relax, Terry. Routines are made to be
                        broken.
 
                                  INTERCOM
                        Is everything all right at home?
 
                                  BALLANTINE
                        Everything's fine. We're having
                        chutney with lamb tonight. Woman
                        needs my input on everything.
 
                                  INTERCOM
                        Can I...order in for you?
 
                                  BALLANTINE
                        I'll be fine.
 
                                  INTERCOM
                        Shall I shut down the phones?
 
                                  BALLANTINE
                        Please. Oh, and Terry?
 
                                  INTERCOM
                        Yes, Mr. Ballantine?
 
                                  BALLANTINE
                        Take an extra hour.
 
                                  INTERCOM
                        Thank you, Mr. Ballantine!
 
                                  BALLANTINE
                        Now hurry up before I change my mind,
                        kiddo.
 
              Ballantine forces a lighthearted laugh and grimly places the
              gun in his briefcase. He peeks into the outer office.
 
              INT. OUTER OFFICE
 
              TERRY, 30's, attractive, hurriedly grabs her things and exits
              into the hall.
 
              INT. PARKING GARAGE
 
              A BEAT UP FORD pulls into a spot near the stairwell.

              INT. FORD
 
              FIN, 30's, shuts off the engine and turns to his passenger,
              JOHNNY, 20's.
 
                                  FIN
                        Tell me again.
 
                                  JOHNNY
                        Dude, I know what to do.
 
                                  FIN
                        Again.
 
                                  JOHNNY
                        Fuck. I go up to the fortieth floor
                        where this douchebag's got his office.
 
                                  FIN
                        Forty-eleven.
 
                                  JOHNNY
                        I go to the bathroom down the hall.
 
                                  FIN
                        West of his office.
 
                                  JOHNNY
                        What?
 
                                  FIN
                        To the left.
 
                                  JOHNNY
                        Right. I mean left. I wait in the
                        shitter till 11:59 and follow his
                        secretary-
 
                                  FIN
                        Executive assistant.
 
                                  JOHNNY
                        Executive assistant to lunch. She
                        always brown bags it downstairs. I
                        stay with her in case she forgets
                        something and goes back up, which she
                        never fucking does. I keep an eye on
                        her and watch the elevators.
 
                                  FIN
                        11:59 on the nose. No earlier.
 
                                  JOHNNY
                        Dude, I know.

                                  FIN
                        I don't want you wandering around the
                        hall looking like you do.
 
                                  JOHNNY
                        This is my best suit.
 
                                  FIN
                        Everything has to be precise. No
                        variations. This guy's clockwork.
 
                                  JOHNNY
                        If he's so clockwork, why do I gotta
                        follow his whaddyacallit around? She
                        ain't comin' back till the dude wants
                        her back, which you said is always-
 
                                  FIN
                        Just in case.
 
                                  JOHNNY
                        Yeah, well what if you have problems
                        with the safe?
 
                                  FIN
                        I won't.
 
                                  JOHNNY
                        So you're clockwork, too.
 
                                  FIN
                        Damn right. You ready?
 
                                  JOHNNY
                        Lemme see the picture again.
 
                                  FIN
                        I thought you knew everything.
 
                                  JOHNNY
                        So refresh my fuckin' memory.
 
              Fin pulls out a photo of Ballantine.
 
                                  FIN
                        It won't happen, but if you see him
                        come out before me-
 
                                  JOHNNY
                        Kill him.
 
              Fin puts the picture away and checks his watch. He holds his
              wrist out. Johnny sighs and mimics him.
 
                                  FIN
                        Lock and load.

              They get out of the car.
 
                                  JOHNNY
                               (under his breath)
                        Lock and load. What a douche.
 
              INT. LOBBY
 
              Fin and Johnny walk past Terry, who is sitting at a table
              outside the deli facing the elevators.
 
              She glances up from her book as the tall, handsome man and
              his shorter, younger friend in the ill fitting suit approach
              the elevators.
 
              She smiles as Johnny reaches quickly across Fin to hit the
              button, to the tall man's obvious annoyance.
 
              INT. LOBBY - ELEVATORS
 
              The doors open, and Johnny steps in, bumping right into
              Ballantine.
 
                                  BALLANTINE
                        Excuse me.
 
              Behind them, Terry goes back to her book.
 
                                  JOHNNY
                        Watch it.
 
              Ballantine and Johnny do the collision dance as Fin's eyes
              grow wide.
 
              He pushes them both into the elevator, pulls out his .38 and
              hits forty.
 
                                  BALLANTINE
                        Hey!
 
              Terry looks up from her book as the elevator doors close.
 
              INT. ELEVATOR
 
                           BALLANTINE                    JOHNNY
                   What are you doing?           What are you doin'?
 
              Johnny looks from Ballantine to Fin, who is now pointing his
              gun at the businessman.
 
                           BALLANTINE                    JOHNNY
                   What the hell is this?        What the fuck is this?
 
              Johnny and Ballantine look at each other and back to Fin.
 
                                  FIN
                        Shut up. Both of you.

                                  JOHNNY
                        What the hell's going on?
 
                                  FIN
                        Goddamnit, look at him!
 
              Johnny does.
 
                                  JOHNNY
                        Oh, shit!
 
              The elevator dings and stops on six. Fin quickly moves behind
              Ballantine with the gun in his back and leans in his ear as
              the doors open.
 
                                  FIN
                        One word.
 
              TWO WOMEN get on the elevator. Fin shoots a look at Johnny,
              who spins around fast and faces the doors in an exaggeratedly
              calm pose.
 
              The women turn to the doors, rolling their eyes.
 
              The elevator dings and stops on ten. The women get off and a
              MAN in a grey suit gets on.
 
                                  MAN
                        Will! How are you, buddy?
 
              Ballantine hesitates, and Fin pushes the gun into his back.
 
                                  BALLANTINE
                        Fine, Doug. Yourself?
 
                                  MAN
                        Couldn't be better.
 
              The man looks at Fin and Johnny, who smiles broadly.
 
                                  MAN
                               (continuing)
                        Hello.
 
                                  JOHNNY
                        I couldn't be better, too!
 
                                  MAN
                        Great. So...I heard about the merger,
                        Will. Congratulations.
 
                                  BALLANTINE
                        Thanks.
 
              There's an awkward silence. Fin pokes Ballantine again.

                                  BALLANTINE
                               (continuing)
                        We're thrilled. Sherry and I can
                        retire if this keeps up.
 
              The elevator dings and stops on fourteen. The man steps off
              and laughs.
 
                                  MAN
                        You mean Shelly.
 
              Ballantine smiles weakly.
 
                                  BALLANTINE
                        Of course.
 
                                  MAN
                        Take care, buddy. Remember us little
                        guys, will ya?
 
                                  BALLANTINE
                        You bet.
 
              The doors close and Fin hits the stop button. The bell sounds
              and he leans in to Ballantine.
 
                                  FIN
                        Try that again and I'll kill you.
 
              Ballantine opens his wallet.
 
                                  BALLANTINE
                        Look, I have a couple hundred on me-
 
                                  FIN
                        Shut the fuck up till we get to your
                        office.
 
                                  BALLANTINE
                        Who are you?
 
                                  JOHNNY
                        I'll take that deuce.
 
                                  FIN
                        You shut up, too.
 
                                  BALLANTINE
                        There's nothing in my office-
 
                                  FIN
                        I said shut up.
 
              Fin hits the stop button again. The bell stops and the
              elevator starts to move.

              The doors open on fifteen and a CUSTODIAN gets on with a
              cleaning cart. His name tag reads WILLIE.
 
              Johnny reaches into Ballantine's wallet and pulls out the
              bills.
 
                                  JOHNNY
                        Next time don't wait so long to pay
                        me back, ya fuckin' deadbeat.
 
              Johnny winks at Willie.
 
                                  JOHNNY
                               (continuing)
                        You get this guy? The more they got,
                        the slower they pay.
 
              Willie nods and smiles.
 
              Fin burns a look into Johnny as the elevator dings and stops
              on sixteen.
 
              Willie gets off and the doors close. Fin shoves Johnny.
 
                                  FIN
                        Goddamn you, act professional!
 
              Ballantine hits the stop button and turns to face Fin, who
              raises the gun an inch from Ballantine's face.
 
                                  FIN
                               (continuing)
                        Start it.
 
                                  BALLANTINE
                        Just tell me what you want.
 
                                  JOHNNY
                        We want what's in the safe.
 
                                  FIN
                        Shut up, Johnny! Start it.
 
                                  JOHNNY
                        You called me Johnny! What the fuck
                        is that, mister professional
                        clockwork I know everything?
 
                                  FIN
                        Shut the fuck up!
 
                                  BALLANTINE
                        There's nothing in the safe.
 
                                  FIN
                        Start the elevator or I'll blow your
                        fucking head off, Mr. Ballantine.

                                  BALLANTINE
                        Look, my wife's in trouble and I've
                        got to get her. Take my credit cards
                        and the cash. I won't report anything-
 
                                  FIN
                        Johnny, start the fucking elevator.
 
                                  JOHNNY
                        Fin, maybe we should just take the
                        wallet. When things get fucked up-
 
                                  FIN
                        Things aren't fucked up, you idiot.
                        Start the elevator. Now!
 
                                  JOHNNY
                        All right. Jesus.
 
              Johnny hits the button and the elevator moves again.
 
                                  BALLANTINE
                        I don't know who you are or what you
                        think is in my safe, but you're
                        misinformed. There's nothing
                        whatsoever-
 
              Fin slams the gun into Ballantine's stomach, who drops to his
              knees as the elevator dings and comes to a stop on twenty-
              three.
 
              The doors open and TWO BUSINESSMEN are standing there. Their
              jaws drop at the sight of Ballantine in his three thousand
              dollar suit kneeling in front of Fin, with Johnny looking on,
              grinning like a loon.
 
                                  BUSINESSMAN
                        We'll catch the next one.
 
              The doors close and Fin yanks Ballantine to his feet.
 
                                  FIN
                        We're going to your office, and
                        you're going to open your safe.
 
              The elevator dings and stops on twenty-seven.
 
              A building SECURITY GUARD steps on. His nametag reads Mike.
              Fin eyes his sidearm.
 
                                  MIKE
                        Hey there, Mister B.
 
              Ballantine is still catching his breath. Fin and Johnny
              exchange a nervous look.
 
              When Ballantine doesn't answer, Mike gives him a closer look.

                                  BALLANTINE
                        How you doin,' Mike?
 
                                  MIKE
                        Workin.' You know.
 
              The elevator dings and stops on thirty. A CUTE GIRL gets on
              and hits thirty-one.
 
              The elevator stops on thirty-one, and the girl gets off.
              Johnny whistles as the doors close. Mike chuckles.
 
              Fin keeps the gun in Ballantine's back and casually reaches
              out to the panel and addresses the guard.
 
                                  FIN
                        Floor?
 
                                  MIKE
                        'Scuse me?
 
                                  FIN
                        You didn't hit a floor when you got
                        on. You want me to-
 
                                  MIKE
                        Headin' up to forty. Mr. B's got me
                        covered.
 
              Ballantine reacts. Fin and Johnny look at each other.
 
              Fin gives Johnny a slight nod, and Johnny reaches into his
              coat.
 
              The elevator dings and stops on thirty-five. Another security
              guard, JERRY, gets on.
 
                                  JERRY
                        S'up?
 
                                  MIKE
                        Goin' to forty.
 
                                  JERRY
                        Me too.
 
              Jerry and Mike stand on either side of Ballantine and Fin,
              squeezing Johnny off to the side.
 
              Johnny starts to pull his gun out of his coat.
 
              Fin shakes his head no, but Johnny doesn't look at him.
 
                                  MIKE
                        Oh, shit!

              Ballantine closes his eyes. Johnny freezes with his gun
              almost out. Fin tenses and reaches for his.
 
              Mike hits thirty-eight.
 
                                  MIKE
                               (continuing)
                        Said I'd clear that shit from the
                        stairwell on thirty-eight.
 
              The elevator dings and stops on thirty-eight. Ballantine
              opens his eyes as Mike steps off.
 
                                  MIKE
                               (continuing)
                        Whyn't you give me a hand?
 
              Fin, Johnny, and Ballantine all look at Jerry. He notices and
              gives a tiny what-the-fuck look at Mike.
 
                                  JERRY
                        That's custodial shit, man.
 
              The doors close and Fin nods once more at Johnny, who again
              reaches for his gun.
 
              Mike's hand reaches in at the last moment and the doors open.
 
                                  MIKE
                        Take five minutes with you helpin.'
 
                                  JERRY
                        Why you always doin' Willie's work?
 
                                  MIKE
                        You seen his daughter?
 
              Mike pantomimes big breasts and Jerry has to laugh, stepping
              off the elevator and shaking his head as the doors close.
 
              Fin exhales loudly and the elevator starts moving again.
 
              Ballantine hits the stop button again.
 
                                  FIN
                        Goddamnit! I'm getting sick of you-
 
                                  BALLANTINE
                        I lied. About the safe.
 
                                  FIN
                        No shit.
 
                                  BALLANTINE
                        But not about my wife. She's in
                        trouble. Really. I have to get to her.

                                  FIN
                        Start the fucking elevator.
 
                                  BALLANTINE
                        No, look. There is money in the safe.
                        Even more than you think.
 
                                  JOHNNY
                        All right, Big Willie!
 
                                  BALLANTINE
                        I didn't have to tell you that.
 
                                  FIN
                        Fuck you, we'd have found out anyway.
 
                                  BALLANTINE
                        No, you wouldn't. There's a hidden
                        compartment in the back of the safe.
                        You wouldn't know to look at it.
                        There's a lot more money there you'd
                        miss.
 
                                  FIN
                        Thanks, Ballantine. Start the
                        elevator, Johnny.
 
              Johnny hits the stop button, and the elevator moves.
 
                                  BALLANTINE
                        I just want you to let me go so I can
                        get to my wife.
 
              The elevator dings and stops on forty.
 
                                  BALLANTINE
                               (continuing)
                        Please, I'm begging you. I didn't
                        have to tell you that, and I won't
                        tell anyone now. You can take it all.
 
              The doors open, and Fin checks the empty hall. He shoves
              Ballantine out and Johnny follows.
 
                                  FIN
                        Oh, we will.
 
              They enter Ballantine's office.
 
              INT. OUTER OFFICE - CONTINUOUS
 
              Fin closes the door gently behind them.
 
                                  BALLANTINE
                        Do we have a deal?

                                  FIN
                        Yeah, sure. You give us the extra
                        dough, and we let you go.
 
              Fin shoves Ballantine toward his office door and winks at
              Johnny.
 
                                  FIN
                               (continuing)
                        A lucky break all around.
 
              INT. PRIVATE OFFICE - CONTINUOUS
 
              Ballantine takes down a picture of himself behind his desk,
              revealing a wall safe.
 
              Fin smiles at Johnny, who nods and removes his gun.
              Ballantine sees this in the reflection of the glass covering
              the picture.
 
              Ballantine takes a deep breath and starts the combination.
 
              He opens the safe.
 
              It's empty. Ballantine hides his surprise.
 
                                  BALLANTINE
                        All the money's in the back.
 
                                  FIN
                        Well, get it out. Shelly's waiting.
 
              Ballantine reacts to his wife's name. He feels around the top
              of the safe and pulls a hidden lever, which opens the rear
              wall of the safe.
 
              The only thing there is a pearl handled .38 matching the one
              in his briefcase.
 
              Ballantine's eyes go wide with shock.
 
                                  FIN
                               (continuing)
                        Got it open?
 
              Fin winks at Johnny and raises his gun.
 
                                  BALLANTINE
                        Almost.

              Ballantine grabs the gun, shoots Fin in the chest, and turns
              to Johnny.
 
              Johnny and Ballantine fire simultaneously and fall to the
              floor.
 
              The three men bleed in eerie silence. The elevator dings.
 
                            INT. FOYER
 
              SHELLY BALLANTINE, 50's, escorts DETECTIVE GARSON to the
              door. Her eyes are red.
 
                                  DETECTIVE GARSON
                        Your husband's secretary was kind
                        enough to identify the body.
 
                                  SHELLY
                        She's a dear.
 
                                  DETECTIVE GARSON
                        If there's anything I can do, Mrs.
                        Ballantine, don't hesitate to call.
 
                                  SHELLY
                        Thank you.
 
                                  DETECTIVE GARSON
                        I can post a uniform outside if you'd
                        like. Until we catch the third man.
 
                                  SHELLY
                        I don't think so. I'm sure he's far
                        away by now. With that kind of money
                        and his partners dead...
 
                                  DETECTIVE GARSON
                        Just want you to feel safe.
 
                                  SHELLY
                        You're very kind, but I'll be fine.
 
              Garson leaves, and Shelly locks the door.
 
              She walks past a GRANDFATHER CLOCK that reads 9:53.
 
              INT. FOYER
 
              The door chimes. The clock reads 2:37.
 
              A light comes on from the hall. The door chimes again.
 
                                  SHELLY (O.C.)
                        Coming.
 
              Shelly enters wearing a robe and opens the door.
 
              Terry, Ballantine's executive assistant, stands there. She's
              wearing sunglasses.
 
                                  SHELLY
                        Terry. Please, come in.
 
              Terry enters and Shelly closes the door after her.

              The two women just look at each other for a long moment.
 
              Shelly moves to Terry and removes her sunglasses, revealing
              her somber face.
 
              Shelly smiles and touches her face gently.
 
              Terry pushes Shelly to the wall, kissing her passionately.
 
                                  TERRY
                        Any trouble?
 
                                  SHELLY
                        None. You?
 
                                  TERRY
                        None.
 
                                  SHELLY
                        The money?
 
                                  TERRY
                        In the trunk.
 
                                  SHELLY
                        Problems with the safe?
 
                                  TERRY
                        Made the switch this morning. I was
                        on pins and needles all day. What the
                        hell did you tell him?
 
                                  SHELLY
                        You'd never believe it.
 
                                  TERRY
                        Whatever it was, the whole thing
                        worked even better than you planned.
 
                                  SHELLY
                        Who knew they'd be such dears and tie
                        up all the loose ends like that?
 
                                  TERRY
                        It was perfect.
 
                                  SHELLY
                        A lucky break all around.
 
              Shelly kisses her and exits into the hall.
 
              Terry hangs back and wipes her mouth distastefully.
 
                                  SHELLY (O.C.)
                        Terry?

              Terry takes Ballantines's briefcase .38 out of her purse and
              smiles. She pulls the hammer back.
 
                                  TERRY
                        Coming, lover.
 
                                                       FADE OUT:

              INT. SEEDY OFFICE ON THE WRONG SIDE OF THE TRACKS
 
              A RUMPLED DETECTIVE sits at his desk, downing whiskey shots
              and gazing through a grimy window on a rainy evening.
 
                                  DETECTIVE (V.O.)
                        It was a dark and stormy night. I was
                        taking a meeting with my friend Jack
                        Daniels when she blew in like a
                        trailer through a twister park...or
                        vice versa...heavy on the vice.
 
              The door bangs open, and A TALL, WET BLONDE leans against the
              door jamb.
 
                                  DETECTIVE (V.O.)
                               (continuing)
                        She was moist, and so was I.
 
              He notices he's spilled his drink in his lap.
 
                                  DETECTIVE (V.O.)
                               (continuing)
                        She just stood there, speechless, her
                        ample bosom heaving with each breath.
                        I leaned back to enjoy the show.
 
              His eyes burn into hers, and move slowly down her body.
 
                                  DETECTIVE (V.O.)
                               (continuing)
                        One look at that wet puss, and I knew
                        I was in trouble.
 
              A BLACK CAT walks in from the hallway, shakes off the rain,
              and heads toward his desk.
 
                                  DETECTIVE
                        Close the door, doll. I'm allergic.
 
                                  BLONDE
                        To-
 
                                  DETECTIVE
                        Yes.
 
                                  BLONDE
                        But-
 
                                  DETECTIVE
                        No.
 
                                  BLONDE
                        Should I?
 
                                  DETECTIVE
                        Please.

              The Blonde opens her purse, pulls out a smoking gun, and
              fires. The cat screeches.
 
                                  DETECTIVE
                               (continuing)
                        Thanks, I needed that.
 
              She blows the barrel, pulls out a handkerchief, wipes the gun
              clean, and drops it on the floor.
 
                                  BLONDE
                        A girl can't be too careful. May I?
 
                                  DETECTIVE
                        Please.
 
              She moves closer, eyeing a bag on the desk. Leaning over, she
              slowly pulls out a piece of pastry, licks it teasingly, and
              then violently forces it down her throat.
 
              She swallows. He gulps. She reaches for the floor.
 
                                  DETECTIVE
                               (continuing)
                        Leave the gun. Take the cannoli.
 
                                  BLONDE
                        Thanks.
 
              She pulls another pastry from the bag and eats, pausing
              occasionally to lick the white sugar from her lips.
 
                                  DETECTIVE (V.O.)
                        She swallowed that cannoli like it
                        was her last meal. Which, I guess,
                        when you think about it, describes
                        every meal, until you eat again.
 
                                  BLONDE
                        Delish! I was ravenous. I blew a rod
                        on Alvarado and...
 
              The detective looks to camera, eyebrows arching.
 
                                  DETECTIVE (V.O.)
                        This could be my lucky night. But who
                        was Rod, and was there anyone before
                        him? Three on a match, you know.
                        And...after that cat...
 
                                  BLONDE
                        ...ran all the way here. Without my
                        T-bird I'm afraid I feel-
 
                                  DETECTIVE
                        -naked?

                                  BLONDE
                        -carless.
 
                                  DETECTIVE (V.O.)
                        Just my luck. Legs that won't quit
                        and a car that won't start. So this
                        double D needs triple A. But why did
                        a broken down Ford excite her so? Why
                        did she come here? Why do I drive a
                        Chevy? I silently wished I had
                        listened to my mother and become a
                        mechanic.
 
                                  DETECTIVE
                        What I know about cars, sister, I
                        learned in the back seat of a Buick.
                        But I'll be glad to call someone who
                        can...check your suspension.
 
                                  BLONDE
                        I'm not here about the car. It's
                        something else. Things are heating up.
 
                                  DETECTIVE
                        You're tellin' me. It's downright
                        steamy in here.
 
                                  BLONDE
                        That's due to the ambient temperature
                        in your office, which converts the
                        precipitation outside from a vapor
                        state to a denser liquid form,
                        initiated by the difference in the
                        temperature of the vapor, creating
                        the mist you call steam.
 
                                  DETECTIVE
                        Don't condensate to me. I don't like
                        being talked down to unless I'm
                        beneath you.
 
                                  BLONDE
                        I'll see what I can do.
 
                                  DETECTIVE
                        So what is it you need help with, if
                        it's not your car?
 
                                  BLONDE
                        It's my husband, Bob. He's cheating
                        on me.
 
                                  DETECTIVE
                        How do you know?
 
                                  BLONDE
                        It's the little things.

                                  DETECTIVE
                        Such as?
 
                                  BLONDE
                        Condoms in the glove box.
 
                                  DETECTIVE
                        Not your brand?
 
                                  BLONDE
                        Not my brand.
 
                                  DETECTIVE
                        Used?
 
                                  BLONDE
                        Ewww.
 
                                  DETECTIVE
                        Sorry, doll. I have to ask.
 
                                  BLONDE
                        No.
 
                                  DETECTIVE
                        I'll see what I can do. But I'll need
                        half upfront.
 
                                  BLONDE
                        I'll see what I can do.
 
                                                       DISSOLVE TO:
 
              INT. SEEDY OFFICE ON THE WRONG SIDE OF THE TRACKS - LATER
 
              The detective is again sitting at his desk, looking pensively
              into the night. The camera reveals the Blonde on her knees in
              front of him, head bobbing.
 
                                  DETECTIVE
                               (shrugs, to camera)
                        She's a little short this month.
 
                                  BLONDE
                               (muffled, stopping)
                        You too.
 
              The detective gently restarts her head. She bobs.
 
                                                       DISSOLVE TO:
 
              INT. SEEDY OFFICE ON THE WRONG SIDE OF THE TRACKS
 
              Card: ONE WEEK LATER
 
              The Blonde sits across the desk.

                                  BLONDE
                        Nothing?
 
                                  DETECTIVE
                        Nothing.
 
                                  BLONDE
                        You're sure?
 
                                  DETECTIVE
                        I'm sure.
 
                                  BLONDE
                        Well.
 
                                  DETECTIVE
                        Well.
 
                                  BLONDE
                        I guess I owe you another...
 
                                  DETECTIVE
                        Some other time.
 
                                  BLONDE
                        You're sure?
 
                                  DETECTIVE
                        I'm sure.
 
                                  BLONDE
                        Thanks.
 
                                  DETECTIVE
                        Don't mention it.
 
              She turns and nearly trips. The cat moans weakly. She exits
              with a wink. The camera reveals A MAN on his knees behind the
              desk, in front of the detective. His head stops bobbing.
 
                                  BOB
                        She gone?
 
                                  DETECTIVE
                        She's gone.
 
              The detective gently restarts his head, and Bob begins to.
 
                                  DETECTIVE (V.O.)
                        Her husband's paying the second half.
                        Community property. And you know what
                        they say.
 
              He leans back and closes his eyes.

                                  DETECTIVE
                        You close your eyes, a mouth's a
                        mouth.

FADE IN:

EXT. COUNTRY ROAD - NIGHT

A late model minivan knifes though the darkness.

INT. CHILD'S BEDROOM

A clown-faced wall clock with 'Brian' spelled out across its

hat reads 11:45 as the clown's tie ticks back and forth.

EXT. COUNTRY ROAD - NIGHT

The minivan rounds a curve, illuminating a large gnarled oak

with a broken limb swinging in the wind.

INT. CHILD'S BEDROOM

Yellow eyes peer from beneath the bed.

EXT. COUNTRY ROAD - NIGHT

The minivan speeds through a flashing amber light.

INT. CHILD'S BEDROOM

Yellow eyes blink.

EXT. COUNTRY ROAD - NIGHT

The minivan barely slows through a stop sign.

INT. MINIVAN

A young boy sleeps in the seat behind his weary parents.

DOROTHY

Jack, you went right through that stop sign.

JACK

There's no one around.

DOROTHY

You don't know that. The sheriff could be parked down the road.

JACK

Sheriff?

DOROTHY

Constable. Whatever they have.

JACK

Constable?

DOROTHY

I don't know who patrols these small towns.

JACK

Maybe Andy Griffith was parked back there.

DOROTHY

Shut up.

JACK

Or Barney Fife.

DOROTHY

All right.

JACK

Aunt Bee, there's a four-eighty-seven in progress.

DOROTHY

(giggling)

Shhh. You'll wake Brian.

JACK

He's out like a light.

Dorothy looks back at her sleeping son.

DOROTHY

He sure had fun today.

JACK

Did you see him spray my sister's kid with the hose?

DOROTHY

Which one?

JACK

The long green one in back.

DOROTHY

No, dingleberry.

JACK

Oh. Debbie.

DOROTHY

Not which sister. Which kid?

JACK

(laughing)

Frankie. Don't you have 'em straight yet?

DOROTHY

Please. You have too many sisters and they have too many kids. Brian

and I will have to learn as we go.

JACK

He's way ahead of you.

Dorothy looks back at Brian, still fast asleep.

DOROTHY

It was nice to see him playing with other kids for a change.

Jack smiles and takes her hand.

JACK

We'll go back on weekends. Be good for us all.

DOROTHY

He slept through the night last night.

JACK

I know.

DOROTHY

You did not know. You'd sleep through a jackhammer.

JACK

True.

DOROTHY

I mean, he didn't wake up once the whole weekend.

JACK

Really?

DOROTHY

Yeah. No nightmares, nothing.

JACK

Wow.

DOROTHY

I think the move'll be good for him.

JACK

Yeah. I just hope it's good for me.

DOROTHY

You said you could write anywhere.

JACK

I can.

DOROTHY

Then what's the matter?

JACK

Nothing.

DOROTHY

Jack.

JACK

It's just that I'm used to the city. The sounds, smells.

DOROTHY

I can do without the smells.

JACK

It's different here. Out in the middle of nowhere.

DOROTHY

Do you think we made a mistake?

He doesn't answer. She waits.

JACK

No. It's not a mistake. I'll get used to it. And it's good for Brian. I

mean, you said he went the whole weekend without nightmares, right?

DOROTHY

Yeah. In a strange bed, even. I was surprised.

JACK

Well, that's better than he's doing at home.

DOROTHY

It's not his home yet.

JACK

It's his bed.

DOROTHY

But it's in a strange place.

INT. CHILD'S BEDROOM

A mouse scurries across the floor and under the bed, falling

silent mid-squeak. Yellow eyes open, then narrow.

EXT. COUNTRY ROAD - NIGHT

The minivan slows and turns onto a pitch black dirt lane.

INT. MINIVAN

DOROTHY

I don't know how you remember where to turn.

JACK

Just follow the breadcrumbs.

DOROTHY

I'll never leave this house at night.

JACK

You'll get used to it.

DOROTHY

Do we own this driveway?

JACK

It's a road, and no we don't. There's another house a couple of miles

past us.

DOROTHY

I've never seen any cars go by.

JACK

It's only been two weeks. You can go a while without seeing your

neighbors out here.

She looks out into the darkness.

JACK

Stop worrying. We'll take him back to see his cousins every weekend.

Next year, there's school. He'll make friends.

DOROTHY

I guess.

JACK

Honey, he played more this weekend than five years in the city. No

nightmares. Come on, he's doing better than he's ever done. I really

think he's coming out of it.

DOROTHY

Maybe you're right.

JACK

(pulling to a stop)

Ain't I always?

DOROTHY

Not hardly.

INT. HOUSE - ENTRY

Jack enters the darkened house, followed by Dorothy with the

sleeping child. Jack turns on the light.

INT. CHILD'S BEDROOM

Yellow eyes open, suddenly alert.

INT. STAIRWAY

Dorothy carries Brian up the stairs.

INT. CHILD'S BEDROOM

Yellow eyes widen.

INT. UPSTAIRS HALL

Dorothy kisses Brian's head and walks towards his bedroom.

INT. CHILD'S BEDROOM

Yellow eyes narrow and tense, waiting.

INT. BEDROOM

Jack unbuttons his shirt, and sucks in his gut in front of the mirror.

INT. CHILD'S BEDROOM

Dorothy enters with Brian, who suddenly thrashes violently in her arms.

She rushes him to the bed. He instantly lies still. She feels his

forehead and watches him breathe for a while, finally tucking the bedding

around him.She pauses at the door. After a moment, she sighs and turns

out the light. Yellow eyes follow her out.

INT. BEDROOM

Jack sits on the edge of the bed, cutting his toenails. Dorothy walks in

and rolls her eyes.

DOROTHY

Would you please not do that on the floor?

JACK

Where should I do it?

DOROTHY

A machine shop.

He stops and pulls her onto him.

JACK

Do I turn you on, baby?

DOROTHY

Oh, yeah. Cuticles make me hot.

JACK

(slow and sexy)

Reeeally?

DOROTHY

Especially when I step on them in the middle of the night.

JACK

You want the toilet seat or the toenails? I can't do both.

She rolls off him.

DOROTHY

Maybe we should bring him in here tonight.

JACK

The therapist said-

DOROTHY

I don't care what he said.

JACK

Did you leave the door open?

DOROTHY

Of course.

JACK

Was he sleeping?

DOROTHY

Yes.

JACK

Then, he'll be fine.

DOROTHY

What if he has a nightmare?

JACK

Then he'll come in, like always.

She looks concerned.

JACK

(continuing)

EXT. PORCH - DUSK

An elderly couple sits on a porch swing holding hands. A police siren

wails, starting the woman awake. The man gently pats her arm

reassuringly. She smiles at him.

OLD WOMAN

You are my knight.

INT. LIVING ROOM - MORNING

The old woman enters the room and stops, confused, as if she has lost her

way.

OLD MAN (O.C.)

Lorelai?

The old man enters, carrying a basket, and takes her arm, gently guiding

her to the couch. They sit, and he waits patiently as she chooses several

cosmetic items from the basket. She hands him her choices, and he begins

mirror for her.

OLD MAN

Lovely.

He turns her head and removes a pin from her hair, which spills down her

back. He runs his fingers through it, gently touching the nape of her

neck. She shivers at his touch, and closes her eyes. He begins to brush

her hair.

OLD WOMAN

Thank you, William.

He smiles and kisses the back of her head.

OLD WOMAN

When will you...

OLD MAN

Later.

OLD WOMAN

Tonight?

OLD MAN

Yes.

OLD WOMAN

I don't want to be without you.

OLD MAN

You'll be fine.

OLD WOMAN

I won't.

OLD MAN

We can do this.

OLD WOMAN

I'm not sure.

There is a long pause.

OLD MAN

Have I made you happy?

OLD WOMAN

Oh, William. You are my knight.

OLD MAN

Have I taken care of you?

OLD WOMAN

Always.

OLD MAN

And you've taken care of me.

OLD WOMAN

Yes.

OLD MAN

I'll make sure you're all right when I'm gone.

OLD WOMAN

I know.

OLD MAN

This evening. We'll watch the sunset together.

OLD WOMAN

That will be lovely.

OLD MAN

Yes, it will.

They smile. Her smile fades, and she looks away.

OLD MAN

Lorelai?

OLD WOMAN

Hmm?

OLD MAN

Penny for your thoughts.

Long pause.

OLD WOMAN

Was it allright?

OLD MAN

What?

OLD WOMAN

You know.

OLD MAN

Yes, I know.

OLD WOMAN

Do you miss not having them?

OLD MAN

Sometimes. Not often.

OLD WOMAN

Are you sure?

OLD MAN

Yes. Do you wish we had?

OLD WOMAN

Sometimes. But you were enough.

OLD MAN

Was I?

OLD WOMAN

You were.

OLD MAN

As were you.

EXT. PORCH-DUSK

The couple watches the sun set. A siren wails in the distance. She

clutches him tightly.

OLD WOMAN

You are my knight.

They smile. Time passes. The sky darkens.

OLD MAN

It's time.

OLD WOMAN

Already?

OLD MAN

You'll be fine.

OLD WOMAN

Can't we wait till tomorrow?

OLD MAN

We shouldn't.

OLD WOMAN

What will I do without you?

OLD MAN

You'll be fine. Are you ready?

OLD WOMAN

No. But I'll try.

OLD MAN

That's my girl.

OLD WOMAN

Am I your girl?

OLD MAN

You are my precious girl.

OLD WOMAN

And you are my knight.

OLD MAN

Just remember I love you. And it's for the best.

The old man takes a revolver from a case at his feet. He smiles at her

gently, and begins to load the gun.

INT. LIVING ROOM-MORNING

The old woman walks slowly into the living room. She stops, as if she has

lost her way.

OLD WOMAN

William?

There is no answer. She looks around, as if in unfamiliar

surroundings.

OLD WOMAN

William?

OLD MAN (O.C.)

Lorelai?

The old man enters with the woven basket, and gently takes

her arm. Her puzzled look changes once more into a dazzling

smile, and he helps her to the couch.

OLD WOMAN

Why didn't you wake me?

OLD MAN

It was late, and you looked so peaceful. And I was very tired.

OLD WOMAN

I want you to wake me when you come home. I missed you so.

OLD MAN

I was gone barely a day.

OLD WOMAN

It was a lifetime.

OLD MAN

It was a lifetime.

He feels something beside him, and finds the gun on the

couch. He smiles, and starts to remove the bullets as she

studies her makeup on the table.

OLD MAN

You never even took it to your room, did you?

OLD WOMAN

You know I never do.

OLD MAN

I worry about you when I leave.

OLD WOMAN

Then don't leave.

She looks at him and smiles. He smiles back. She looks back

to the basket, and makes her choices, which she hands to him.

He smiles, and begins.

© Chipperoni    Comments/Questions:   chip@chipperoni.com